Tuesday, November 18, 2008

How Well Do You Know Your SEX?

This is a Sex quiz. Please maintain your sense of humor! It's intended to be funny AND factual. Oh, and you'll need a piece of paper and a pen.

How well do you know your SEX?

1. Which one of these is NOT another name for a man's balls?

a. Gonads
b. Testicles
c. Prostus
d. Bullocks

2. The order they go in- front to back on a woman:
a. Clit, Vagina, urethra (peeing), anus
b. Clit, urethra (peeing), vagina, anus
c. Urethra (peeing), clit, vagina, anus
d. Vagina, clit, urethra (peeing), anus

3. Which method is the only method that prevents pregnancy and protects against most STDs?
a. The girl using a sponge
b. The guy using spermicide
c. The girl taking the "pill"
d. The guy wearing a condom

4.Who has a Vas Deferens?

a. Girls
b. Guys
c. Both
d. Neither

5. A girl can get pregnant:

a. From oral sex
b. From anal sex
c. From vaginal sex
d. Only from oral and vaginal

6. A girl cannot get pregnant:

a. If she is on her period
b. If the guy pulls out and does not cum inside her
c. If the girl washes herself out after having sex
d. She can get pregnant all of those ways

7. A man's balls swell and shrink and "move around" because
a. That causes sperm to be made
b. It keeps the balls at a certain temperature
c. It's good to embarrass him when he gets cold
d. Natural worms inside his balls are either sleeping or doing exercises

8. The "Labia" is another name for:
a. The walls of the vagina
b. The skin on the outside of the penis
c. Where the woman's eggs come from
d. Both sides of the skin outside of a girl's vagina

9. What do most girls need to happen in order to "cum"?
a. Rubbing in their vagina
b. Rubbing on their clit and vagina
c. Rubbing on their nipples and vagina
d. Rubbing on their clit

10. You can get STDs and infections from:
a. Oral sex
b. Anal sex
c. Vaginal sex
d. All of the above

11. Most girls' periods last how long?
a. 1-3 days
b. 5-7 days
c. 8-10 days
d. 12-14 days

12. When a guy gets "fixed" by a doctor so he can't have kids, what happens?
a. His penis is cut off
b. His balls are cut off
c. His prostate is removed
d. Two small tubes in his body are clipped and clamped

13. When a girl gets "fixed" by a doctor so she can't have kids, what happens?

a. Her vagina is sewn shut
b. Her cervix is tied shut
c. Her ovaries are removed
d. Two small tubes in her body are clipped and clamped

14. A hysterectomy is:

a. Reconstructive surgery for a guy who's had his balls injured
b. When a woman's breasts are surgically made smaller or bigger
c. A tube inserted into a guy's penis to make it bigger
d. When a woman's uterus and reproductive organs are removed

15. Which is NOT another correct name for a guy's penis:

a. Cock
b. Dick
c. Lollypop
d. Dork

16. Which is true?

a. Boys and girls both have testosterone and estrogen
b. Boys have testosterone while girls have testosterone and estrogen
c. Boys only have testosterone
d. Girls only have estrogen

17. The main job of the prostate is:
a. To create sperm
b. To mix the sperm with other liquids to make "cum"
c. To stop the penis from peeing and "cumming" at the same time
d. To get blood to the penis to allow it to become hard

18. When a girl "cums", she'll always:
a. Scream
b. Faint
c. Pee
d. Get extra "wet" and her nipples harden

19. The first time they have vaginal sex:
a. The girl may bleed from the vagina
b. The boy may bleed from the penis
c. A girl can't "cum" until she's had sex more than once
d. A boy can't "cum" until he's had sex more than once

20. Which expression is NOT used to say a girl is on her period?
a. On the rag
b. Aunt Flo is visiting
c. Time to sponge
d. Having a cycle

21. If a girl's ovaries are like a guy's balls, then
a. Her vagina is like his prostate
b. His penis is like her vagina
c. His urethra is like her fallopian tubes
d. Her clit is like his penis

22. Most girls can get pregnant naturally between the ages of:
a. 12 - 50
b. 11 - 40
c. 15 - 60
d. 9 - 70

23. Which word is NOT used to talk about pubic hair?

a. Bush
b. Carpet
c. Cauliflower
d. Thatch

24. "Statutory Rape" is when:

a. A girl is drugged and then raped
b. One of the people having sex is under 18
c. Both of the people having sex are under 18
d. A person is kidnapped and then raped

25. A "dildo" is:

a. A vibrating ring a guy wears around his penis to stimulate pleasure
b. A prosthetic "extension" to make a guy's penis longer
c. A clamp sex toy used on nipples, and genital tissue to heighten pleasure
d. A cylinder shaped sex toy designed to imitate a penis

26. The numbers and letters on a girl's bra mean:

a. The number is her breast weight, the letter is the breast size
b. The number is her breast size, the letter is the bra thickness
c. The number is her rib cage size, the letter is the breast circumference
d. The number is her dress size, the letter is the breast size

27. A condom can be reused if:

a. It has not been ripped and you rinse it out
b. You turn it inside out
c. You boil it first
d. A condom can never be reused

28. The size of a guy's hands and feet:

a. Are twice as big as the size of his penis
b. Are half the size of his penis
c. Have nothing to do with the size of his penis
d. Are proportional to his height

29. The size of a girl's hands and feet:

a. Are proportional to her height
b. Are half the size of her breasts
c. Are half the size of her waist
d. Indicate the size of her pelvis space and pubic opening

30. How soon after unprotected sex can a girl get a positive pregnancy test if she's pregnant?

a. The next day
b. About one week
c. About two weeks
d. One month

31. How often should someone get STD tested if they're having sex?
a. Every three months
b. Every eight months
c. Once a year
d. In a committed relationship testing is optional

32. An orgasm is:
a. Muscles contracting
b. A chemical release in the brain
c. A psychological state of mind
d. Muscles contracting and a chemical release in the brain

33. Sex is for:
a. Bonding, procreation, keeping chemicals in the body normal
b. Bonding, keeping chemicals in the body normal, cleanliness
c. Procreation, instinct, recreation
d. Instinct, recreation, cleanliness

34. A blow job is:
a. A kind of anal sex
b. Blowing into each others mouths during sex
c. Oral sex on a guy
d. Foreplay using a vacuum cleaner

35. Foreplay is:
a. When four people have sex together
b. Touching, kissing and sensual teasing before having sex
c. Rose petals, wine and a romantic dinner
d. A back rub and a beer

36. What are "blue" balls?
a. Painting a guy's balls blue with paint
b. What happens when a guy has been cold for too long
c. Sexual frustration buildup with no release
d. A term to describe an STD guys get on their ball sac

37. What is "cunnilingus"?
a. Another word for masturbation
b. A blow job on a girl
c. Sex in the shower
d. When a girl does anal sex on a guy with a sex toy

38. Which sense does a girl get "turned on" and "turned off" the fastest by?
a. Sight
b. Sound
c. Touch
d. Smell

39. What can a man eat to make his "fluids" taste better 12 hours later?
a. Papayas and cayenne pepper
b. Cinnamon and pineapple
c. Alcohol and broccoli
d. Chocolate and barbecue sauce

40. Which of these on a guy is the biggest turn off to most women?
a. Sweat
b. Extra pounds
c. Back, ear and nose hair
d. Lack of a tan

41. Having frequent orgasms has been scientifically proven to:
a. Cause eventual blindness
b. Contribute to Alzheimer's Disease
c. Save you money on car insurance
d. Lengthen your lifespan

42. What is meant when a guy has 'gotten to third base'?
a. French kissing
b. Oral sex or using hands directly on genitals
c. Looking at each other naked
d. His batting skills aren't very impressive

43. What is "69"?

a. Oral sex while driving in a car, from the song 'Highway 69'
b. Lying opposite to each other and sucking on each other's toes
c. Each person giving their partner oral at the same time they're receiving it
d. A threesome with two guys and one girl

44. Which are NOT the most common body toppings used during sex?
a. Peaches and cream
b. Strawberries and chocolate syrup
c. Carmel syrup and whip cream
d. Honey

45. What three locations are the most "adventurous" places to have sex?
a. In a car, on an airplane, in a closet
b. On an airplane, in a dressing room, outside during the day
c. In your parent's bed, in a dressing room, in a hotel
d. Outside during the day, on a motorcycle, in your own bed

46. You can tell the "date rape" drug is in your drink or food by:
a. The taste doesn't seem quite right
b. The smell is different than usual
c. It makes your tongue tingle
d. There is no way to tell the drug is in your drink or food

47. "Impotence" means:
a. A guy cannot get his penis hard or keep it hard
b. A girl cannot get her vagina wet or keep it wet
c. A guy is unable to have children
d. A girl is unable to have children

48. Drinking alcohol and smoking:
a. Is a bonding experience for both sex partners
b. Can cause impotence, birth defects and shrink a guy's balls
c. Increases the chances of having an orgasm
d. Turns you into a porn star lover

49. What makes the best and safest "lubrication" during sex?
a. Plain water
b. Your spit
c. Olive Oil
d. Silicone based lube

50. Which STDs are incurable and can/will kill you?
a. HIV/ AIDS, Hepatitis B and C, HPV
b. HIV/ AIDS, Gonorrhea, Trichomoniasis
c. HIV/AIDS, Hepatitis B and C, Chlamydia
d. HIV/ AIDS, Syphilis, Genital Warts

ANSWERS - One point for every correct answer

1. C -Prostus is just a made up word and mean nothing in any language

2. B –Pleasure, pee, pro-creation, poop

3. D – Only the condom prevents the sperm from finding her egg or exchanging germ filled bodily fluids

4. B – The tube a man’s sperm travels in from the testicles to allow ejaculation

5. C – A girl’s eggs are only naturally accessed from her vagina

6. D – If sperm is present the same time as an egg, pregnancy is possible

7. B – Sperm and production and maturation require a certain body temperature. Being too hot or too cold can kill or deform them.

8. D- Labia ‘lips between her hips’, are folds of skin outside the girl’s vagina

9. B – Most women require both clit AND vaginal pleasure to climax

10. D – Any exchange of bodily fluids allows germs/ diseases to be shared

11. B – Most girl’s periods last about one week, give or take a few days

12. D- The Vas deferens tube is clamped or snipped and “tied off”

13. D- The Fallopian tubes are clamped or snipped and “tied off”

14. D- You’d get hysterical if your reproductive organs were removed too!

15. C- Only Lollypop cannot be found in a dictionary as a correct name

16. A- Boys have more testosterone and girls have more estrogen, but each gets both

17. C- Squeezing off the pee tube or the sperm tube, this allows one or the other to happen like a switch for train tracks. Removing it = lose self-control for both!

18. D- fluid is created to kill off the weak sperm and add lubrication. Nipple hardening is like getting goose bumps, you just can’t help it.

19. A- breaking the ‘hymen’ skin flap or rubbing the before unused vaginal walls can cause bleeding for a girl

20. C- A girl may want a sponge bath, but it’s not a commonly used expression

21. D- Ovaries create girl’s eggs and balls create guy’s sperm. Her clit is her most sensitive pleasure-part that causes orgasm, so is the tip of his penis.

22. A- most girls start their periods around age 12 and hit menopause around 50.

23. C- Cauliflower is a veggie and a wrestling ear injury term.

24. B- One of the people having sex is legally old enough (18) and one is not old enough.

25. D- a sex toy that is made to penetrate an opening like a penis

26. C- the number is rib cage size. The letter is how big around the breast cup is.

27. D- Literally a ‘one shot’ protection, they can never be reused.

28. C- Sorry. Doesn’t mean a thing. But his shoe size IS also his ring size.

29. D- A girl’s feet size indicate the size of pelvic opening. Small feet = small hips.

30. C- It takes two weeks for a build up of chemicals to confirm pregnancy. A blood test might tell a few days sooner.

31. A- It takes three months for most contracted diseases to show symptoms. Testing should be this often.

32. D- The pulsating of your body are the muscles contracting, the pleasure you feel are chemicals in your brain.

33. A- Creating babies, creating emotional ties and keeping the body hormones balanced

34. C- Using one’s mouth on a guy’s penis and surrounding areas to give pleasure and possibly make him climax.

35. B- Sensual interaction that arouses and sets the “mood” to have and enjoy sex

36. C- typically known for guys, but becoming sexually aroused, often staying in that state of arousal for a while, and then not getting to climax.

37. B- a long name for one using their mouth to orally pleasure a woman’s sensitive areas between the legs and possibly bring to climax

38. D- smell is the quickest way to arousal and the quickest turn off

39. B- you are what you eat, sweet food makes your fluids taste better, sour, bitter or strong flavored food also change a person’s fluid tastes.

40. C- hair in funky places is ‘grosser’ to a girl than any of the others

41. D- inducing a ‘happy feelings’ chemical balance in the body, releasing stress, aids in relaxation and does in fact lengthen your lifespan.

42. B- physical contact with the genitals with hands or mouth

43. C- simultaneous oral sex, both pleasing and being pleased.

44. A- tasty sounding but peaches and cream are not the typical body toppings.

45. B- airplanes, dressing rooms and outdoor daylight exposure present the biggest challenges and greatest risk for being caught= most adventurous

46. D- The fact it’s completely undetectable is part of what makes it so dangerous

47. A- a guy who cannot ‘achieve erection’ or keep himself hard long enough to have sex or climax.

48. B- can wreck havoc on a male’s junk- everything from deformed sperm to not enough sperm to make babies, to not getting it hard to shrinking testicles

49. D- Water isn’t slippery, spit can have germs in it, olive oil stains cloth and can put holes in condoms, silicone based lube is considered the safest.

50. A- Currently there is no cure for AIDS, Hepatitis or HPV and all three cause eventual death related complications.

How did you do??

Less than 20 Correct
Wow. You are too young or too immature to be having sex. You need to wait a few years and do a LOT of Sex Education homework! Google is your new best friend!! Until then DO NOT under any circumstances have sex with anyone! Your ignorance is a danger to yourself and the entire planet! Go get a chastity belt. NOW!

20- 30 Correct
Eh. You have a basic understanding of the whole sex process but you should NOT be having sex with anyone! It's scary to think how many people like you are going around having sex and thinking you know what you're doing! Go back over the ones you got wrong and find out what is REALLY going on. Chances are you'll not only be more comfortable with people of the opposite sex- you'll understand yourself better too! Until then, you are not a safe person to be having sex. Education is critical!

31- 45 Correct
Hmm. There is still much to be learned but at least you are somewhat informed. Keep doing your Sex Ed homework. Until then- NO sex! Seriously. People who are confident but really don't know enough of anything, are often more dangerous than people who know they don't know anything! Get the facts BEFORE you get laid.

46- 49 Correct
Good job! Since you have a pretty general knowledge of sex, you are probably pretty intune with your body and that of your partner. You're probably also not ashamed to admit you don't know everything and hopefully know that you have more to learn and are actively learning (and not just from practice!) Friends don't have the answers though. Facts from trusted sources are what will keep you safe and happy. But you already know that!

50 Correct
You either cheated or you are a sex Guru! You are probably a safe and good partner because you are informed and have common sense. Continue to get information and to use that information and good sense to be safe, and considerate to your partner. Enjoy! (One word of advice: Don't partner up with anyone who scored less than 46!)

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